my toaster knows me better

15 May

my doorknobs are resentful

and whisper to the carpet

he’s home, get ready to record

my apartment watches and listens

to every word uttered in haste

my toaster knows me better

than i know myself

and my stove wishes it didn’t

my television keeps a daily watch

and my table agrees with the chair

i need to exercise more

they all think they are pretty darn smart

i wish i could just switch them all off

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